Drawing the Lines Then Asking For Favors

I think people today are too quick to draw their line in the sand. This includes both the 'progressive' thinkers and the very 'conservative' thinkers. It includes those who think very little, and those who think very much. No matter where we stand, we can feel really good about our positions and understandings. We can also feel superior to other people who do not stand where we do. As we all know, sometimes the painful divorce occurs and someone draws their line in the sand and marches off to another church or worse, out of the church business. Most often they operate in another church, playing better games by more specific rules. Often those left behind wonder what went wrong ... and why someone had to leave. But with no communication, various feelings can develop (dismissal, anger, revenge, hurt, fear, lack of trust, etc.). What I find so interesting is the way that some who leave still want to hang on to certain aspects of fellowship. On the one hand a brother cannot sit for one hour in a building and worship the same Father with you, but he still wants you to send him the church bulletin so he can keep up with what's going on. A sister cannot attend worship with you, but she still wants you to come to her social events that she has planned. Someone who will speak ill of you to others and who believes that you are in error still wants you to place someone on the prayer list who is ill. Is it just me or did someone who will not set foot in the church building for one hour just ask me to participate with them in the giving of gifts at a party where we will be together? I'm not trying to be snotty or get away with not giving a gift, but I feel a big "H-E-L-L-OOOOOO" coming on! I mean, are we able to segment our lives this neatly? If someone decides not to be in fellowship with me, that should apply across the board, shouldn't it? I guess I could be a good johnny boy and just go along to get along. But there is something about all of this that raises my ire! It is not a dislike or hatred for the people who seem to not know that they drew a line in the sand, far from it. In fact, most of the people who have decided to leave our church a few years ago are wonderful people and I mostly have no idea why they left. But there is a misunderstanding here of what is going on. If we are no longer worthy of one's company, why do you want our prayers and gifts. Still, most of the people in my congregation are much better than I am. I'm sure the prayers will go forth, the gifts will spring aplenteous, and civility and niceties will be expressed. My big question is: If you will not sit with me for one hour while we worship our Father, why do you want me to come to your house for an hour and pretend that there is no problem between us? I'm sure it's not for the gifts. Surely. If you draw your line in the sand with me, I will always welcome you back. But while you have decided that I am not worthy of your presence, please do not ask for my presents. Well, I had to get that off my chest. If I deserve a rebuke, go right ahead.